6 Sex Therapists Share What They Do To Break Out Of A Sex Rut


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By Krissy Brady; Photography by Pexels

Want to be a penis whisperer? Get ready to take notes.

Let’s go ahead and assume that dating a sex therapist would be pretty rad. Between your S.O.’s built-in boudoir skills and the super-sexy ways you could play off the whole teacher/student vibe, we see a whole lot of sex happening.

But, hey, sexperts are people, too. And even they need to take their own advice to spice things up from time to time.

We asked them to spill the beans on the things that have made a big difference in their sex lives.

Behold…

1. Naked Time

“On Sundays, my S.O. and I (usually) spend all day naked. We snuggle, cook, eat and there’s no sex allowed until we build up so much sexual tension that we can’t take it anymore. We make out through the day, but sex doesn’t usually happen until later in the afternoon or evening. It’s the ultimate bonding experience!” – Debra Laino, clinical sexologist

Watch: 5 Sex Positions Perfect For When You Want To Get Rough

2. The Penis Whisperer

“Although every man is different, I learnt about the most sensitive parts of the penis – including the head of the penis (glans) and the frenulum. Mastering your guy’s super-sensitive areas takes sex play to a whole new, mind-blowing level.” – Rachel Needle, psychologist

3. Talking Nerdy

“One of the reasons I became a sexologist was because I wasn’t orgasmic for quite some time. I thought there was something wrong with me. But once I started learning about the anatomy of the clitoris, as well as the rest of the genitals, it made me more conscious of what I was experiencing during sex. That knowledge helped me learn to come.” – Carol Queen, sexologist

Watch: Exactly How To Have A G-Spot Orgasm

4. Get Deep

“I know it’s not very juicy, but there’s truly nothing sexier than getting on the same page, emotionally. So many couples let the things they don’t talk about drive a wedge between them, which is a total intimacy killer. My husband and I have really deep conversations, which strengthens our bond and opens the door to experimenting.” – Claudia Luiz, psychoanalyst and author of Where’s My Sanity?

5. Ladies First

“The philosophy I live by is simple: she comes first. It’s important to take a ‘viva la vulva’ approach to sex. Orgasms don’t need to happen simultaneously. Instead, they should happen one after the other. I’m not afraid to extend some sexual courtesy.” – Ian Kerner, author of She Comes First and Passionista

Watch: 101 Sex Tips That Will Have You Turned On For Days

6. Practice Makes Perfect

“I use my own expertise to learn – and test out – hot new tricks and tips. Best. Homework. Ever. My top go-to moves are playing with temperature (ex: frozen grapes during oral sex) and mastering sex positions to ensure they hit the G-spot every single time. One of my favourites: lie on your stomach with your hips swivelled sideways and legs bent. Have your guy kneel between your legs and lean forward so his arms are on either side of you. From there, it’s all in lifting the hips as he penetrates. It feels like a yoni massage (Google it) and fills you up!” – sexologist Carlen Costa

Want in on more sexy secrets? Here are 10 ways you can have better, stronger orgasms, here are five ways to make sex with condoms feel way better.

Watch ON: Sex Sex Tips